Day 544: Clown Shoes, Clown Terror

Thoughts in my head right now.

Maybe I am getting old. Clearly I cannot work a 14 hour day, get five hours of sleep and get up and do it again. Nope. The body now says, "No dice" and stops functioning.

Two hour naps in the late afternoon/early evening are not a good idea but clearly my body was telling me something. I just slept the sleep of the dead for the past two and a half hours. First thought upon wandering out of my room and seeing the socks and undershirt that Gary wore today, "Oh he melted" a la the Wicked Witch of the West style.

Clowns are scary as all hell. Read Stephen King's It. That is the ultimate in terrifying clown stories. I don't walk on or look down into sewer grates because of it. End of story.

Despite my all-encompassing fear/hate/distrust of clowns, I do tend to like beer from Clown Shoes Beer. The latest selection is the Clementine--a witbier.

From the Clown Shoes' website, it is light-bodied and crisp and has plenty of zest. It's hazy in appearance and healthily carbonated. It uses Chambly yeast to energetically shape its wheat malt base. Incorporated into the brewing process is clementine, sweet orange peel, coriander and Summit hops.

So what did I think? It poured a hazy, deep orange color with a smallish white head. It has the aroma of unpeeled oranges and grain. It has a strong hop profile with a nice amount of citrus flavor. There's something kind of dank about the flavor. I tend to expect a brighter flavor from a witbier but there was definitely something lightly earthy about it.

Beer stats
Style: Witbier or white ale
ABV: 5.9%
IBUs: Unknown
Rating: Good

Previously reviewed from Clown Shoes
His review of Clementine, Muffin Top (tripel)
My review of Vampire Slayer (imperial stout)

Clowns? Dammit.

Day #526 Clementine / Clown Shoes Beer, Ipswich, MA
Previously from this brewery: Vampire Slayer and the awfully named Muffin Top

It's a dull, dreary day outside, and that's not making me motivated to go to work tomorrow.  I refuse on principle to talk about work on this website, but I've been struggling lately with the notion that I don't know what I do for a living.  Allegedly, I find out on Monday.... maybe that's good.  Or, you know, not.  We'll see. Apologies for being cryptic, but that's how it goes.

With that bit of news looming on the horizon, let's just shut it down and get into a beer review.  Today's offering is a bottle of Clementine from the dubiously named Clown Shoes Beer.  In the glass, you see a dull gold color, with a lingering thin head.  There is an aroma of fruit and yeast, and when you take a sip, you get plenty of wheat, oranges, and some spice, with very little bitterness.  Very good beer for summer, when you want something with a nice citrus or fruit profile.  Although, this beer has a way to go to catch up to champion summer fruit beer, the Hell or High Watermelon from 21st Amendment.

Nice!

The last time I drank a beer from Clown Shoes, I ranted about the terrible name of the brewery.  This is still true; clowns are the worst.

Thing to Think About Today:
I have no intention of writing about clowns, but I can get behind shoes, I suppose. I mean, I wear them and everything.  They keep my feet warm.  So, on a quiet, lazy day, I will share with you a fantastic song for quiet, lazy days while we think about shoes.  Paul Simon, the afternoon belongs to you and Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-I_T3XvzPaM

"And then she slipped into my pocket with my car keys"

John Wayne Gacy Liked Clowns. Coincidence?

Beer #91 Muffin Top / Clown Shoes Beer, Ipswich, MA

My attitude change last night is paying off, I think.  Hit the road for a run this morning, hit the gym to lift (read: watch tv), spent some time writing, and then it's an afternoon spent in Philly for some quality bar time.  Today also means we're now 25% of our way through this 365 different beers from 365 different breweries in 365 days tour.  Many beers down, many beers still to come!

We'll start the drinking today with Muffin Top, a tripel from Clown Shoes Beers.  This beer pours a hazy, amber orange and has a wispy white head.  You get a yeast and fruit aroma from this beer, and the flavor has notes of orange, pine, citrus, and bitter hops.  A solid beer all around with a good balance of flavors.  This being said, I'm probably not likely to drink many of these in the future.  Why, you ask?  I'll tell you: the brewery name.  I don't like clowns.  In fact, I don't know ANYONE who likes clowns.  I probably know people who tolerate clowns, or at least don't despise them, but let's be real - NO ONE likes clowns.  They're creepy as all get out.  Marketing matters, people.

Good beer, bad name.

Thing to Think About Today:
Maybe I'm being too harsh on this brewery.  Maybe.  However, I solemnly refuse to post something in this space that would make you think about clowns any more than you already have today.  So, we'll switch gears and check in with the greatest comedy of all time for their take on... muffin tops:  Top o' the muffin to YOU today!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHtWEH0euh4

May today bring you no muffin stumps.

Beer 64: Clown Shoes Vampire Slayer

iPod is rocking the shuffle:

Johnny Cash Hey Porter
Chemical Brothers Galvanize
Coldplay God Put a Smile Upon Your Face
Flight of the Conchords I Told You I Was Freaky
Vampire Weekend Run
Bob Dylan All Along the Watchtower
Killers Joy Ride
U2 Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me
Mick Jagger Salt of the Earth
Johnny Cash Help Me
A Tribe Called Quest Jazz (We’ve Got)
Wilco At Least That's What You Said

Last night was dinner at Jose Pistola’s with friends.  If you’re familiar with Philadelphia, it is in the same building that was once Copacabana 2.  The nachos were awesome.  I detest nachos that have all the toppings just plopped on top of the heap of chips.  Good nachos are all about the layers and these were definitely made the right way.  There were about 15 beers on draught and a pretty extensive bottle list.  I went with the Clown Shoes Vampire Slayer -- an imperial stout described as having more sweetness and depth than their previous offering.  Their description also mentions that it is brewed with holy water and malt smoked with vampire killing stakes.  You have to love the irreverent humor!

I noted the alcohol warmth immediately in my notes on this one and after doing some research today I learned that it is a whopping 11%ABV.  One was definitely enough.  It was super dark, almost black, with a loose dark tan head.  This was a risky choice for me because I don’t like smoke flavor.  More often than not, I think smoke makes things taste like sausage.  I don’t like sausage so I don’t want my beer tasting like it.  Lucky for me, the smoked malts were very mild and I really enjoyed it.  The taste was what you’d expect for an imperial stout.  Roasted malt flavor, vanilla.

There was also Tramp Stamp available from Clown Shoes….an IPA that tasted like soap.  And that is why I don’t drink IPAs, folks.  They remind me of soap.  I didn’t order that one.  My friend had that honor but he very willingly shared it so we could all get a taste.

Highlight of the evening:  I eventually ordered a Duchess de Bourgogne (Flanders red ale) after sipping some of the one Gary ordered.  His came in a wide flute.  Mine came in a goblet.  As our waiter poured it, he apologized for the glass, calling it one of his greatest professional embarrassments.  He delivered it with absolute seriousness and very much reminded me of one of my favorite comics - Mitch Hedberg.  His Comedy Central show is one of the funniest things I’ve seen in my life.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6xaj2fC1jI&feature=related

I’m off to drink my beer for the day.  Cheers!